I am feeling down

I stayed on the diet plan yesterday and today, but I did not exercise. The left over food from the weekend is still in the house, which is really getting to me. There are cookies and a cake and candy that I just want to eat until I explode but I haven't.

Why is it that the years of packing on the pounds went so fast, but the time it's taking to get it off is painfully slow? I mean today, dragged!!!!!!! and its only 7:45pm! Is it tomorrow yet?

I have been stuck floating around the same few pounds since before Christmas. I feel like I am never going to get out of this 10lb range I'm working on. I am going to change my weight lost ticker so I only look at this current 10lbs I'm fighting..seeing the larger number in the "to go" field is not helping motivate me. In fact its adding to this depression I'm fighting with right now...ok let me go do that....There I changed it.. only 9.5 pounds to go! much better.

Today I worked on potty training with my son... and spent most of the day in the bathroom. He's just not getting it :-( I think tomorrow I need to push myself and exercise as soon as I get up, or it's not going to get done.

Wish me luck!
Still Fat in NJ

I did everything wrong in the last 24 hours...

I ate and ate and ate some more! And to top it off, I didn't work out!!!!
The important thing is that I STOP right now, and do not allow myself another day of over eating.

We had company last night and I cooked a yummy dinner.. and they brought yummy dessert... today we ate the left overs. But I need to stop. I had my fun, I ate enough for a small village... Back on the diet, back to working out tomorrow... do you hear that??? not one more day of this madness.

Did my work out

I did a 30 minute work out this morning. I am tired!! I think I'm getting bored with this DVD and should try something new. I found a few more tapes when I was cleaning that I never opened.. you know those tapes or DVDs you buy thinking.. "I'll work out this time" and never do. The Ramp It Up section of Slim in 6® is just getting to me. Time to switch so I don't get bored and stop working out.. right? anyone here yet? anyone reading me yet?

We are going food shopping now, then tonight we are having company over for dinner. So I won't be sticking 100% to my diet plan, but that's okay because I just keep pushing forward and continue on my quest.

I'll let you know which tape or DVD I work out to tomorrow.

Healthy living everyone!
xoxox

Not much to say today

Went to my weigh in. I'm down one pound. It's always nice to move my weight ticker over. I am going to reset my exercise ticker too, but I don't see getting a work out in today. It'll have to be first thing in the morning when I get up tomorrow.

happy dieting :-)

Still Fat in NJ

Today I feel beat down...

We all have those days...those emotional draining days. That's when I usually eat, eat and eat...but today I didn't!

Today started out okay enough... my husband woke me up early and even thou I didn't want to get out of bed and even laid back down for a while, I picked myself up and did Ramp It Up section of Slim in 6® . I knew I had to get it done before the meeting I had about my son at 11:30.

This workout is hard. I do my best and keep up. I thought the first half was bad but now that I'm doing the whole 47 minutes the 2nd half with the resistance bands makes me sweat more. I swear to you I am seeing a difference in my body already. My sides and waste are feeling smaller, my arms are feeling stronger. And the best is, today when I got dressed, I looked down and didn't see my stomach sticking out past my boobs.

I'm really glad I got that work out in, because after the meeting I was too drained to do anything more than run a few errands. I even napped with my son this afternoon.

Tomorrow is my weekly weigh in. I'm hoping for big numbers, no whammies. I am very excited to tell Dr. Ransom that I did 3 hours of exercise this week. I am hoping to see my muscle mass up!!

I'll keep you posted... well I mean I'll write my skinny self a another entry tomorrow.

Still Fat in NJ

There's a thin girl inside me trying to get out!

And she's taken control!! I worked out again today. One more workout and I will have actually made the 3 hour mark that Dr. Ransom wants me to make every week. The most I've done in a week is just about 2 hours. I know I can do it.

We had things to do this morning and while out my son fell asleep before we got home. I carried him up the stairs...all 40lbs of him.. it was hard..I kept thinking I used to carry that much weight on my body. My scale has me down 40lb but the doctor's scale is 5lbs difference. Anyway, I knew it was a perfect time to go work out. I put him in bed and did the Ramp It Up section of Slim in 6®

My shoulders are killing me. The resistance band part is amazing and hard. I am feeling the burn as they say so I know I'm doing it right. As I'm sweating and it's burning, I keep thinking "I want to wear shorts this summer". Plus we have a wedding to go to in June that my son is the ring bearer. I want to look good and wear a dress. I can do it!!!

I am really looking forward to my weigh in this week. With all the exercising I'm doing I am hoping to see my muscle mass go up. My personal scale hasn't moved at all. It sometimes happens when I'm getting close to that time of the month or it could be because I'm burning fat and building muscle.

That's it from me.
Tomorrow is another day.

Thanks for stopping by
Still fat in NJ

I did it!!

My whole body is shaking and I have jello legs again but I did it, I finished the Ramp It Up section of Slim in 6®. The last few minutes of stretching all I could think of was "I need a shower" so I stopped the DVD and jumped in the shower.

I really can feel this work out working. Yesterday I really felt like my waist was smaller so I had my husband do my measurements. Sure enough 2.5 inches off my waste, 3 off my hips, 2.5 off my thighs and 2 off my arms. I'm amazed! That side oblique crunch she has you do is a killer. I showed my THIN husband the move last night, he did one and said "that's hard". Debbie Siebers says in the DVD "if you do this every day your waste will get thinner"...SHE'S RIGHT!!

This is only my 3rd week doing her DVD. I hardly worked out in December and gained back 2lbs...which to me was great considering all the eating I did all month long. So anyway I know darn well that the inches I got off didn't happen between Thanksgiving and New Years..They happened after New Years when I started giving 100% again.

I am really feeling good and I feel thin.. by no means am I THIN!! I am still in that "Morbid Obesity" category. But working out every day, sticking to my diet plan as dropped my BMI almost 10 points. Just a little more work and I move out of Mordid Obesity into Obesity yippie...lol what a funny thing to be cheering for, but it's the little steps that are keeping me going!!

I watched Heavy on A&E last night. Anyone see it? Wait, I'm still talking to myself.. nobody is reading my blog, so of course nobody saw it, nobody is here! Well it was inspiring. Hard work, diet and exercise does work...no need to jump on that gastric bypass band wagon. I've had several friends who went that route and some of them have gained the weight back!! What did they learn? Did they work out? nope!! so none of their habits changed and they still are eating unhealthy foods.

I have one friend Cheryl who fought with her weight and with hard work and exercise she's at a healthy weight! You can read her success story here.

Well my son is jumping all around asking for an apple, guess my blogging is over! I hope it's nap time soon, we've been up since 5:30.

Thanks for reading my big fat @$$ blog

That damn peanut butter chicken!!

That damn delicious peanut butter chicken I made for my husband and son was calling my name. I still had a shake and half of bar to eat for today but I couldn't get past that peanut butter chicken... so I had some. I didn't over do it, I didn't finish it off like I could have. I tried to keep my "cheat" in check. And just because I had a half of breast of peanut butter chicken doesn't mean I failed or giving up.. it means I'm aware of what I ate and will move on.
I can do this! I can be thin!!

Happy Monday

It always makes me feel good when I wake up and the number on the scale has gone down. I know experts will tell you to only weigh yourself once a week.. well I have my official weigh ins on Fridays.. but it helps me stay in check to look at that number every day!!!

I did my work out already for the day. Yippee.. but man are my legs killing me. I am currently working out to Slim in 6®. This is my third week using the program. I did great the first week on Start It Up section. Last week I did 2 days of Start It Up and then did one day on Ramp It Up.

Ramp It Up is kicking my big fat ass!! I've only been able to get through half of that section. When she gets to the part where you need your training bands my legs are like jello so I haven't done the 2nd half YET!! I did find my training bands thank goodness, so I'm all set when I'm not shaking like jello legs...Jello legs makes me think of "spaghetti arms" :-)

Yesterday it really felt like my waste might have gotten smaller. I haven't done measurements since November. Maybe it's time to do them again. I just checked, the last time I did measurements was right before Halloween. It's totally time to measure my big fat ass!!

Now in case you're following my blog.. HA HA I know I'm talking to myself.. you'll notice a bunch of changes. First I renamed the blog address. Calling it my big fat ass blog and not using that as the address seemed silly. Next I made a fat ass cartoon and made the header and changed the blog colors.. nice huh? Well I think so. It makes me smile.

It's taken me almost an hour to write this post because I keep getting up to check on my son. He just asked for a snack of APPLE!! I am so happy, I'm doing something right. What a healthy snack. I cut up the apple for him and gave him 4 baby spoons with soy peanut butter on it.

I'm so happy that's what he asks for. I don't want him to have a weight problem. I know if I teach him healthy eating habits now, he will continue with them as an adult. He's even been doing some of the exercises with me!

Healthy eating wasn't even talked about in my house growing up. My mother had the junk food lined up on the counter. I could grab a pop tart any time I wanted and there was no mentoring how many of those double packages I ate!! Then when we visited my father the drive threw was our best friend. Eating Burger King in the back seat of his car was our normal dinner when we visited him.

Now it's time for me to go play SAHM and fold all the laundry, finish the shopping list and play with my son.

have a good day
Still Fat in NJ

Sunday Morning Workout

Well I just finished a mini work out.. and I mean a mini one, only 15 minutes. I haven't worked out in four days and it's always hard to get a half hour or more in if it's been this long. No wonder I could hardly do anything when I first started, I had no stamina.

Tomorrow's work out should be better and longer. I am really enjoying Debbie Siebers's Slim in 6®. If you are looking for a work out video try one of hers.

Thanks for reading
Still Fat in NJ

Saturday....

Saturdays are usually hard to stay on my diet. Something always seems to be going on, someone will call and ask us to go out for dinner....but today was just a do nothing day. So I was able to stay on my diet.

When I made my family dinner, I thought about having a bowl of pasta, but then I thought about how bad I want to lose the next 30lbs, so I past on the pasta. It's those little steps that make me know this time I'm going to be thin!

Thanks for reading :-)
Still Fat in NJ

down 1/2lb

so the scale said I'm down a half pound. In the past I would have been pissed but I'm not. Like I said my doctor at the center for medical weight loss has an awesome scale. I lost a pound of fat this week. That's GREAT!! and because I'm working out my muscle mass went up 1/2 lb. So that's why the scale only showed a 1/2 loss.

I'm not upset, not discouraged... I would be if I was only going by a normal scale. I'd feel like I have been working hard and it's not moving.. but the fact is it is moving... there's more to it than just a single number on the scale.

I hope to be able to get a work out in today, but with life there is always unexpected problems. So I'm hoping my husband comes home early so I can get some work out time in. If not that's the first thing I'm doing when I get up tomorrow.

Still Fat in NJ but feeling better!!

Weigh in is tomorrow

My official doctor weigh in is tomorrow but my scale doesn't look like it's moved :( I wasn't 100% on my plan over last weekend but I got right back into working out and being good, so it's making me mad that the scale hasn't moved. I shouldn't get too upset because the doctor's scale is AMAZING... it just doesn't say a number or flash a sign saying "you're fat, you're fat" it gives me a print out of my water weight, muscle weight and fat weight. So even if the number doesn't change, I can see I lost fat and gained muscle or water weight.
I didn't get to be as big as a multi-family house over night, so I'm not going to get to a condo size any time soon and I'm fine with that as long as I continue to make good choices.
I'll be back tomorrow with the official results of this weeks weigh in.
Still Fat in NJ

The Sly Saboteur

dunt dunt daa
Enters my evil nemesis, The Sly Saboteur...She lurks around the corner waiting for me to feel vulnerable and hungry...She enters my house with, not just a few, but TWO gallon size bags of freshly made homemade cookies.

She has tried and succeeded in the past to derail my diet plans, leaving me with crumbs all over my face from gobbling down her delicious cookies and ultimately going completely off my diet leaving me fatter and more unhappy....

But not this time you evil Sly Saboteur, she says with her hands on her hips, I'm Super Fat @$$ Girl and you will not defeat this time...BEGONE WITH YOU..

I sent her packing with her two gallon size bags!!!
Three Cheers for my big fat @$$!
hip hip hooray

Still Fat in NJ

We interrupt this day with an important message

I'M HUNGRY!!!!!!!
I'm hungry, I'm hungry I'm hungry. some days I just can't take it and I break down and eat food instead of just sticking to my shakes. with just two days left before my next weigh in, I really need to be on my game. So I thought if I came here and admitted that my big fat stomach is growling I could face myself and tell myself I can do it.
I am going to go have a nice big glass of water. I can do it right? but why can't I stop thinking about cheez-its? next cheat day I think I'll get some.. but I don't have a planned cheat day coming up for a while.. grrrrr did I say I was hungry?

Snow Day

All schools are closed here today, not that my son goes to school yet, so it didn't matter to me. It was coming down hard last night but it's fine out there now.

My son is happy and playing. I decided to dress up my blog and check the title to my big fat @$$ because it made my girlfriend laugh so much.

I'm taking today off from working out, my knee is killing me so I'm resting it. But that doesn't mean I'm off my diet. My next weigh in is this Friday at 11. Even if my weight stays the same this week I'm hoping to see the muscle go up because of how hard I've been working. We'll see.

Back to our snow day
Still Fat in NJ

my big fat ass

i just got off the phone with a good friend who also fights with her own weight issues. She is really thin now.. even thou she'll tell you she has to lose a little more... I'm telling you I'd be NAKED all the time if I looked like her :-)

Anyway I told her I started a blog about my fat ass and she burst out laughing.. What? that's funny? My ass is fat, and this is my blog!

This is my inspiration. In this picture is my big fat panties I was wearing at my heaviest with my current smaller size on top so I can see my fat ass shrinking. By no means am I thin but man I'm feeling great!!


Waves good bye to my few friends who know about my fat ass blog!

have fun???

If I thought exercise was fun I would have never gotten up to the morbidly obese category with a BMI of 54!!! I am a heart attack waiting to happen. But some how I picked myself up and went to the doctor for help. I'm so glad I'm not doing this alone anymore and I have real help.

Anyway since I was up super early I decided to get my work out in first. I'm currently working out to >Debbie Siebers's Slim in 6® which I bought about 6 years ago where it had remained in the box until just recently. Apparently I did open it because the training bands are missing... rats.. now I have to go looking for them...oh boy just rambling on here.. the point is, Debbie says "just have fun with it" REALLY? really you beautiful THIN woman? have fun? the big fat moo cow over here can hardly get her leg up to do your side kicks and you think I'm having fun?

UGHHH it's so hard... BUT I have come along way since last June. I could hardly keep up with >Richard Simmons! Then I tried >Jillian Michaels OMG she's so far beyond what I can handle. I don't know how those Biggest Loser people keep up with her.. and I'm about the same size of them.

I'm very happy doing the Slim in 6® and what I like the best is that there is a time counter in the corner so you know how long you have to do that part and how much more of the workout you have to go. But I'm still not having FUN!!! I'll let you know if FUN is ever a word I use to describe a work out!

Thanks for reading :-0
is anyone reading? doubt it - I'm just talking to myself
Still Fat in NJ

it was a hard day

I had a very stressful day with my son...and being an emotional eater these days are usually harder for me to stay on track. But today I used my anger to get a good work out!! My fat rear end did a really good 30 minute work out.

While doing some crunches my little boy came up by me and said "Mommy you can do it, I'll give you more energy" and got down to give me a hug while I laid on the floor sweating.

I'm really glad I stayed on track and got a work out in.

Thanks for reading :-0
Still Fat in NJ

Took me long enough

I don't know why it has taken me so long to post my first post on this blog. I think about it almost every day but some how I don't make the time...that's going to change.

This blog is about my weight loss journey and I don't mean a Gastric Bypass. I am dieting and exercising and getting help from The Center for Medical Weight Loss.

I have NEVER been thin as an adult...or even a "normal" size. I remember weighing 100lbs and being told I was fat since I'm only 5ft. So the idea of being anything other than FAT alludes me. But I'm not giving up.

Sometime last June something clicked in my head that the only thing I could control was what I was eating... Hence my start to my new goal.. getting thin and loving myself aka project 143. for those that don't know 143 is code for I Love You..I didn't know either when I first heard it.

Since the end of June 2010 I have lost 33lbs. To have a healthy BMI I have a long long way to go.. so I create small goals for myself. Right now my goal is to get into a dress for a wedding this coming June. I hope to have lost at least another 30lbs but would be jumping for joy if it was 40lb.

Thanks for reading :-0
Still Fat in NJ