Day 52 -This one is JUST right

I stayed up much later than I wanted to reading 50 Shades of Gray. When Anthony came bouncing out of bed like he does very morning, I was really kicking myself in my big fat ass for staying up so late. I will not make the same mistake tonight, plus I'm in no mood for Mr. Grey. In fact he would hate me tonight because I'm breaking a rule and doing it on purpose! so take that Mr. Grey

I had a nice morning with my boys and when Anthony got on the bus I came in to face the evil Ms. Michaels! I've been doing the 30 Day Shred for some time now, so I thought it was to go back to No More Trouble Zones.

I was right! My shoulders, back and legs hurt...but that good hurt from working out. I will be sticking with this DVD and doing those dreaded Surrender Exercise. I was doing pretty well with the work out, was almost done, but the phone was ringing and it was the doctor's office, they needed to reschedule my Friday appointment. Then Alex started his little fussing that he does when he's hungry, so 30 minutes was all I got in of the 40 minute work out.

When Anthony came home from school we went right to his dentist appointment. He had his check up and teeth cleaned. Then Nonna treated him to his favorite pizza, eggplant parm pizza. Anthony stayed downstairs by her, Alex up by me, then the roommate came home and I just needed to get out of the house and be alone. So I decided I would return the bigger dresses, but not before trying them all on again one last time.

If you missed any of the Quest for the Dress posts, the story begins with my post from March 11. Then continues on March 21 and a very happy me on April 4th.
Here I am today in the size 22 that I bought first. This one is too too big

This is me in the 20 - This one is too big

And the size 18 is JUST right - well almost just right and I still have a whole month to work on my belly!
If you ask me I think you can tell by my face I needed some down time. 

I got to Lane Bryant to return the dresses and the woman asked "Why are you returning them?" even though I was moody I was happy to answer "They are too big"

Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$

Day 51 - shorts to big

When I did my work out today I knew my shorts were to big, but I figured what difference did it make? umm... they were falling off with every jumping jack until I pulled them up higher and then rolled them down around my waist to bunch them up. Finally they stayed on, but they will need to go into the "these clothes are too big pile" I <3 that pile!!!

Today's extra push resulted in 4 sets of 22 jumping jacks and the last set was 26 jumping jacks. I couldn't push past the 2 sets of 7 push ups, but I will! Those push ups are KILLERS.

Before


I could NOT move at the end. I had to lay there for a bit.


The rest of the day has been pretty lazy, hanging and playing with the boys. I am going to scrap now and then get myself into bed early I have a date with Mr. Grey. 

Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$

Day 50 - took the day off to scrap

sometimes you just need a day off and today was my day off. I took care of my sons and scrapped all day. I'm STILL not done with everything I need to do for ADSR. I have to start my detour challenge. But I have to finish the collab kit for May and that's due on Monday! UGHH why did I wait until the last minute.

Here's the template I created today for my monthly template challenge at NDISB

Alexander is very cranky from getting his preemie shots yesterday so he's still up and I have Baby Eisenstein First Sounds on for him. The minute he's sleeping I'm going to call it a night and go lay in bed and ready 50 Shades of Grey.

Tomorrow FIRST THING will be my work out! Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$

Day 49 - I wanna celebrate and live my life

This is my song of the day

Today I did 5 sets of 20 jumping jacks and 2 sets of 7 push ups! In January I couldn't do any of that!! In 4 short months I am seeing such a change in my attitude, my endurance and my clothes! Its really so hard for me to believe it's this simple.

You just have to push yourself a little bit at a time, THERE'S NO EXCUSE. Just get your ass up and do something for 30 minutes a day, WALK, jog in place, jumping jacks. I started out "sweatin to the oldies" because that's all I could do. Now I'm keeping up with that evil b!tch Jillian Michaels... is it just me? or does her voice get on your nerves too?? I have to mute the b!tch and put on music.

I did my work out before Anthony was even awake




I swear I just sweat buckets!!! Maybe this is how the fat is leaving my body...LOL 





I took a shower, got Anthony up, fed Alex, got Anthony ready for school then off I went for my weight in with my #1 fan Alexander. I was hoping for a good number, not an AMAZING ONE!!!! down 4.5 pounds in one week!!!!!!!! This is my best EVER! I thought 4.5 in two weeks was good.

Now I can't get too cocky, because that will just make me screw up. Plus I know I have weeks where nothing changes. But as along as I drink my water with my 3 lemon limit, work out every day, I will see my body change. Sometimes it won't be about the number on the scale but how much I can do physically.

I'm making a list of things I want to be able to do

• push ups - getting there
• sit ups
• climb a rock wall
• hang from the monkey bars
• move hand over hand from bar to bar on the monkey bars
• RUN - started running a little while walking with Twiggy
• do the crazy sparta race with Cheryl-  in 2014 sister not next year!
• and I want to hike in Zion National Park and see The Subway
  

I am hearing the Rocky Theme in my head a lot as I push to reach these physical goals. As far as the number on the scale goes, I can't believe how much it's moving down. I think I'm going to reach the goal I wanted for the YEAR by the end of July.

Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$

Day 48 - 6 weeks to go

I have 6 more weeks to go until my personal 90 day challenge is over. Since I started on March 9th I have pushed myself to work out more, be extra careful if I eat out, started doing exercise moves I never thought I'd be able to do like surrenders and plank push ups and I went down two sizes! And today I noticed when I look down my stomach doesn't stick out further than my boobs.

I am totally amazed at this woman I am becoming.

I forgot to take my before picture again!!! I was trying to make sure I got my work out in before Tornado Tony came home from school.


Overall it's been a quiet afternoon with Tony hanging out with Nonna, you know her as The Saboteur.  The Roommate is on his way home, I already made him dinner so maybe he'll just leave me alone all night! I have to put together my challenge for The Amazing Digital Scrap Race, which starts on Boyfriend's birthday.

Oh they are playing a game over in the forums at the Amazing Digital Scrap Race where you have to come up with a new meaning for ADSR.
imagine you have no idea what does it means and you have only the first word :
Amazing
D.....
S.....
R.....

here are my two answers
Amazing
Discipline
Sees
Results 

Amazing
Disconnected
Soulmates
Reconnect 


Hope you have a good evening and I will see you back here tomorrow after my weigh in!
Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$

Day 47 - Art Show

 I can't stop smiling from this wonderful day.  I knew I had to get my work out in before I left to help at my son's school. This morning I had to get a file over to Twiggy and then I was making plans for the tournament I'm going to in July, I was so busy I forgot to take my before picture.

It took me longer than I thought to get myself ready and pack everything I needed for the day, but when I was finally dressed and ready to walk out of the house I FELT GREAT IN MY NEW CLOTHES. When I walked into the school gym, Anthony's aid said she hadn't seen me in a long time and I looked great. I really love that people are noticing, it really makes me want to work harder. I felt so good, that I swear I even felt taller. I walked around help set up and did whatever they asked me to do.


When the saboteur got there with my Aunt and Uncle she would make this pissy face every time someone said they could see how much weight I lost.

When my friend Denise's sister and parents got there, the saboteur actually walked away with her pissy face. I had such a GRIN because I knew it was eating at her. She just loves to tell me how fat I am but she can't really do that with everyone else saying they can see the change.

Boyfriend told me to ask to borrow her clothes and then give them back and say they are too big. I think what happen tonight was better! But I will sneak into her room and put on a pair of her jeans to check to see if they are too big. Then I'll be doing the happy dance :-)

You might be wondering why it's such a big deal about her. In 2009 I found this doctor I asked her for MONTHS to watch Anthony for me to go and see what it was about. She was too busy, or she forgot, or she had things to do. Meanwhile she was losing weight and looking good and every time she had on something new I told her she looked good. Her replies were always something nasty like "I'm starving myself" or "I go to be hungry" crap like that. She was saying this to other people too. I don't know why it's so hard to say "Thank you, I'm working hard"

One day I was out of milk so I went into her apartment to borrow some. In her refrigerator was all these bottles of shakes. I took one out, looked at it and read that it was from The Center for Medical Weight Loss. I went back upstairs and cried and cried. I couldn't believe she was that much of a B!TCH to actually go to the doctor I had been trying to get too. And this is not the first time she did this to me with a diet.

She SCREAMED at me in 6th grade when I was 100lbs and had started developing in 2nd grade and hit puberty by 4th! By 6th grade when all my friends were just starting to get boobs, I was done growing and a kid in a woman's body with a C cup. I was NOT FAT! I know that now, but I didn't know it then. She put me on a diet making me eat things I still hate. She swore she would do the diet with me.

One day she forgot to pack the dressing for my salad in my lunch, because she was a teacher in the school I was in, I went to the teachers room to ask her for some of her dressing. I hoped the door to the teachers room, looked for her and saw her sitting there having Chinese food and not the gross salad she packed for me. I looked at her, started to cry and walked out. She didn't come after me, she didn't talk to me that night and that was the end of that diet. I had a sandwich the next day.

There is something wrong with this woman. This is not how you should act with your children. There's nothing I wouldn't do to help my children, especially when it comes to their health. All of you who know all the details of my two boys know that's true. I need to be healthy enough to raise them, I need to be a good roll model. The have to learn good habits from me! 

Back to the Art Show...I am going to have to give in and say boyfriend is right, people are sensing my confidence because several people (mostly guys) were asking about the frames and how much.  One guy was talking to me so long that his wife came over and gave him a dirty look. I thought it was funny! I was pushing around a baby in a stroller after all.

We took a few pictures of my little artist. Here he is holding up his Andy Warhol inspired sponge painting of his name and a few favorite letters.

And this is my favorite of me and my little artist. He even has a Wubbzy Artist eye patch on.

 I posted this on facebook tonight to brag about my little masterpiece. I was NOT expecting the comments that followed:

Cousin Chris posts: Look how skinny his mom is getting!!!! I saw you 3 - 4 weeks ago, and you've definitely lost visibly since then!
Cheryl said: MAria: you look aawesome!!!!
Cousin Arlena said: You really look great in this pix! Great job!
Cara said: Oh my heck, girlie.... you look fantastic!
Jenn said: you are the incredible shrinking woman....just amazing!
Kelly M. said: you look amazing, keep up the good work!!!

And the grin from their comments and likes has been on my face for HOURS!! Even when the roommate started fighting with me, I started fighting back, but then stopped myself and said "You are NOT worth it" because he couldn't find WIPES when the whole case was on the floor next to him!


And the last BIG thing of today, The Center for Medical Weight Loss asked me "Do you mind if we post your pic to give everyone a bit of encouragement?" and "Would also love to have you on our main site as a Success Story!"
 I told them I'm not a success yet!!! I'm a "getting there" story

See you tomorrow after I do my work out!!! And again I can't wait to do it. I am going to add in a little of the ab dvd too, then I'll really be sweating like a pig.
Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$

Day 46 - I have NOTHING to wear!

I did my work out shortly after Anthony went to school. I pushed harder and was able to do 4 push ups in plank position. I remember when I couldn't even hold myself up in plank and that was just in January. Tomorrow I will try for 5, but I know it will take a few days to get it. I like these physical fitness goals I give myself, it makes my journey about being healthy and fit not just a number on the scale.

Here I am at my computer getting ready to work out and here I am with my cheering section that fell asleep while watching me work out.
As I was getting dressed to go get a hair cut I really am having problems finding things to wear that fit me correctly. My jeans are all too big. The pair I'm wearing right now are so loose, I can pull them up to my bra!  They are baggy around the knees, they just look horrible. Which is FREAKING me out because tomorrow I am volunteering at my son's school and the last thing I want to look like is a slob. So I think after I get my hair cut I'm going to go to the Avenue and see if I can find a better pair of jeans. I just can't wait to go shopping on May 12 with Jenn, just no way!
Can you tell my jeans are big in this picture???
Jackie at Moda Salon did my color, cut and blow out in less and 2 hours. I love my hair. The roommate was home by then so I dropped Alex off to him to go on my mission to find jeans. Off to the Avenue where I brought 6 pairs of jeans into the dressing room to try on.
None of those jeans worked so off to Lane Bryant I went. The woman working there all helped me find straight leg petite jeans, in the dressing room and was thrilled to get my big fat ass into those 18!! They are just a little snug around the hips but no way was I buying a 20! These 18s will last me all summer until the autumn when I will go shopping for a smaller size GRIN!!
I was so happy I looked for a new shirt, the lady handed me a 14/16!! She's crazy I took the 18/20 in the dressing room. Here I am in the 18 jeans and 18/20 shirt.

I walked out of the dressing room and now two woman are telling me the shirt is too big and tell me to try on the 14/16 All I see is my big fat belly, so now they give me a pair of spanks and send me back in. This time I try on the purple shirt.

Yeah it looks better but I still see my big fat belly. I need to do more crunches, reverse crunches and bicycle crunches. I might have to try that Jillian Michaels 6 week 6 pack again. It was so hard for me I couldn't do most of the moves, so I will add it to the 30 shred and do what I can.

I started talking with the sales lady about how long she's worked there and I said I've been shopping here for almost 20 years. She said she didn't remember seeing me before. Then since I was THE QUEEN OF THE NILE over what size shirt, she asked me about my diet. I really need to start carrying a before picture with me, so I took out my drivers license to show her. 

She looked at the picture then looked up at me and said "I know the woman in that photo but I don't know you" WOW!! And that pretty much is how I feel. I don't know this new kick ass me who's working out and has fitness goals BUT I LIKE HER!!!   

Next I try on the red shirt because I wasn't sure which color I liked
SOLD! love the red one. Even my smile was bigger. There was one last shirt I like so I tried that on too. Still a little tight but I took it. I like having GOAL CLOTHES it makes me work harder. 


Speaking of "goal clothes" this is the Quest For The Dress. I'm aiming for this to be my 'mid summer's night dream' goal dress :-) I would love to wear it when I go away mid July.

One last thing I tried on tonight.. which was really the first thing I tried on, when I went to Costco to pick up a photo card order I designed for Twiggy.

Eli who works in the photo center was busy helping a crazy lady so I waited for him to be finish and checked out the jewelry. I love love LOVE this ring, the shape of the stone, the color of the stone, which is for November which is a very special month to me and I like the diamonds around it and on the band.
The ring ALMOST fit my finger, so I asked what size it was...a SEVEN!  My Wedding band is a 9 1/2. I stopped wearing it when I started calling him The Roommate so I had no idea my rings wouldn't fit me either. I think the only ring I have in a 7 is my high school class ring.

I guess when I said the only thing that fits me is my shoes, I wasn't lying, and that's because Jenn and I just bought shoes 2 weeks ago.

I can't wait to work out tomorrow morning... OMG did I just type that?? I can't wait to WORK OUT???!!!! 

See you tomorrow after the Art Show.
Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$

Day 45 - work out done already

Slept late, got up, fed Alex, woke Tony, fed him, threw dinner in the crock pot, Tony dressed, got him on the bus and it was ME TIME!!!!! I love this new, take no bullshit from anyone, me who works out. She awesome! Where the hell has she been all my life???? I must have been drowning her out by shoving M&Ms and chips down my mouth.

I did my 30 day shred, well I get it's 45 day shred for me...lol Before

Sweating like a pig


Took a shower, text a few friends and here I am blogging before 3pm in the afternoon with my cutie on my lap.

Too bad the weather sucks or I would call Twiggy to met us for a walk/run around the blog. So I guess I will scrap, I have to design BBQ invitations. Enjoy the rest of your Monday, see you back here tomorrow!
Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$

Day 44 - my "other" birthday

Ignore the title it's not for you. :-)

Like I said yesterday I got up and worked out, well after I had a cup of coffee first. I started listening to music  during my work outs instead of hearing that Evil Bitch Talk during the 30 day shred. I am doing much better pushing myself too. In fact today I did 4 push ups. Holy Moly those are hard! But I know the more I keep pushing the more I will do.
Before





I sweat so much I should be a tester for deodorants! I could also be a tester for sports bras!!!

I showered and started to get dressed. I am really having a hard time with clothes, nothing fits correctly besides my shoes. I can't wait to go shopping with Jenn on May 12! I posted this picture and my cousin Michele said "Yep...clothes are too big!"




Well I have to deal for a little while. I am making my shopping list: a dress for my cousin's wedding, pair of jeans, pair of shorts, sports bra, 3 shirts, that has to get me through the summer. Then I am hoping by September I need to get even smaller clothes, well maybe October :-)

Off to Harmon, Babies R Us and the A&P I went. Something keeps happening when I go food shopping... I am getting checked out! WTF?? I am no where near a healthy weight but yet every time I am out some guy checks me out. The first couple times I ignored it, but a few guys have stopped to talk to me and when they do they all look at my ring finger to see if I am married. I'm flattered but don't get it! I certainly didn't get checked out when the scale was the same number and going up.

I set a text to boyfriend, the one who makes me smile, not the one who will hide the body. He said "You feel good about you... guys sense that" It's still hard to believe that's all it takes to be noticed by a guy.  How come I didn't get the memo on this years ago? lol


I got home and waited for my mom to come home from her vacation. My brother came over and he told her about our cousin's passing. It went just like I thought, she was in and out of shock and crying. We took her over to see my aunt and cousin after we told her and stayed there for two hours. I got her home poured her a glass of wine and talked for another 2 hours. She's going to be upset for a while but she'll be okay.

Now before we told her, this happened...and I swear I would have just went back to my apartment if we didn't have to tell her anything.

My brother looked different, new glasses? new hair cut? so I said you look good, you look different are those new glasses? (he usually wears contacts that's what it was) He said no, then my mom jumps in with "he's tall and thin and his hair is dark"  My brother says "look at Maria she's thin" to which she replies with "she'll get there" AND THAT LADIES AND GENTLEMEN IS WHY SHE'S KNOWN AS THE SABOTEUR

 Here are the numbers depending on where you want to count down from:

• From when I first started the diet in 2010 to today I am down 44.5lbs
• I was at my heaviest when I gave birth to both my boys reaching the same number on the scale. So from this past Nov 3 when I gave birth to Alexander to today I am down 71.5lbs!
• From the weigh in when I started the diet again after I had Alex (which is what I am counting) I am down 34lbs

And tonight was the saboteur's first comment in months. Last time she said anything it was "I can't tell" sometime in February when I was down about 20lbs. I wonder if I give her a few bags of potatoes to carry if she'll notice 34lbs? She can go suck a lemon but it better not be one of my 3 lemon limit!

Time for bed, then up to do my work out :-)
Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$

Day 43 - sore and tired

Feels like I never woke up today. I have been super sore, not just my legs from my little run, but my arms from pushing the stroller on my little run. No matter how much I wanted to, I couldn't find the energy to work out after I cleaned the house this morning. So I am going to bed early and will work out first thing tomorrow!

Since I don't have work out photos check out my boys. Anthony went out with the roommate this afternoon for some fun and got his face painted like a tiger


Mr cranky pants Alexander wanted mommy all day


Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$

Day 42 -"motivated, determination, inspiration"

"motivated, determination, inspiration" from cousin Michele, Angel and Jenn. Denise added "I still need some of what you got!" I'm so surprised when someone says anything like that, I still don't see myself like that. It's about my health, it's about changing my life, it's about not dying and leaving these two little boys. It's about making sure we all lead a healthy lifestyle. If they don't learn it from me, who's going to teach them?

Every Friday I get excited and nervous about heading over to Dr. Ransom. He's always so nice and supportive about everything. Even when there is something coming up he will help me with ways to get through that event. I just always think any scale HATES ME...lol But it seems this super duper scale they have is in love with me. :-)

I like to do all the settings and the girls let me, so I put in my height, then female, put my age in, grab the handles and close my eyes and say to myself "Please please please let me have at least lost a pound" When I opened my eyes to see the number today, I COULDN'T EVEN DO THE MATH THAT FAST!  I kept saying "How much is that? how much?"  Until Jen said it's 4.5lbs!!!!! (can you see my smile?)

That is for two weeks not one. Dr Ransom was on vacation last week. Prior to this my personal best for two weeks was 4lbs which was on March 2, 2012 before I started my 90 day challenge and I didn't even blog about it. My personal best for one week is 3.5lbs on March 23, 2012. And only one week I didn't lose anything, I went up .5 of muscle and down .5 of fat, so I broke even which was on March 30, 2012.

I did a few errands after the doctor's, then waiting for Anthony to come home while talking to my cousin Michele. Anthony had a snack, I fed Alexander then Twiggy sent me a text asking if we could go for a walk. Out the door we went, Anthony running and me pushing Alex in the stroller.

The streets around here are all hill, so I knew it would be a work out just pushing Alex. And then I added a run from the turn around the block from one corner to the next up hill!! I thought I was going to die, my legs are still burning. We did this 4 times.  I am going to keep doing this until I can run some more.

I got home made dinner for the roommate and Anthony while they ran out to do an errand. Since it was quiet with just me and Alex I put in the 30 day shred and worked out.

Before and After




I am really surprising myself. I am so happy my ticker moved down and I'm really on my way to this next goal.
Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$

Day 41 - Which DID am I?

I am totally beat, it was a crazy day. I started out laughing over my 3 lemon limit and by 5pm I was in tears, then by 10pm I was pissed off. I think I am still getting PMS, I will talk to my doctor.  I bet at tomorrow's weigh in I will have no lost anything! I have nothing else good to say because Sleepy Time DID (Damsel in Distress) has taken over.

I have 22 "DID disorders" given to me by my crazy lovable DDKers that I'm trying to hunt down on Facebook. Here are all my DID disorders: Plain-Old DID, New and Improved DID, Evil DID, Dizzy DID, Dragon DID, Designer DID, Las Vegas DID, Editor DID, Super DID, Hunk Hunting DID, Suess DID, Sleepy Time DID, Commando DID, Special Ops DID, Office DID, and Nervous Break Down DID.

So here is...oh man, which DID am I when I work out? I can't go over my 22 DID disorders either!!
anyway here is my before



And after sweating like a pig and drinking my water with my 3rd lemon!! Even if I swear to the Lemon Police I'm going to go over my 3 Lemon Limit I never do. The Lemon Police love me and it wouldn't be fun anymore.




Tomorrow is my weigh in at 1pm. I am going to be Nervous Break Down DID for sure if that scale hasn't moved!
Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$

Day 40 - WOW

I'm on  day 40? really? I need to check out many days I've worked out during that 40.. hang on.....


35 out of the 40 days of my 90 day challenge I have worked out! GO ME!!!!
3 days off for being sick, 1 holiday off, 1 grieving day off

Even though I scream at that evil bitch Jillian Michaels on the 30 shred DVD when she says "those of you on day 5, 6 and 7 can feel a difference in your endurance" She's right. I am feeling it and seeing it.  Even the jumping jacks I had a hard time with when I started. I still can't keep up with her and sometimes stop during the 2nd cardio jumping jacks, but I'm keeping up with the first set in the warm up and the last set in the 3rd cardio part. I couldn't do that 40 days ago. But I still think she's EVIL!!

I get so mad when she stops her work out to go by the girls to show us what to do. There should be a video for people who don't know how to do her work out and then one with her doing it with us the whole time. I want to kick her little ass when she stops.


Before



I really pushed myself tonight - Sweating like a pig



Every night I'm trying a little more, first I worked on being able to do more jumping jacks. Now I'm working on getting into plank position to do push ups. HOLY SHIT THEY ARE KILLERS!!!!!!! They are worse than the surrenders I've been able to do 3. I continue to push myself and I look forward to the day I can do push ups without feeling like I'm going to die.

That's enough from me, I have to get back to doing a little scrapping for ADSR and maybe get to bed before 2am. See you tomorrow!!!
Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$

Day 39 - I almost forgot to work out!

I got so busy working on things for The Amazing Digital Scrap Race that I almost forgot to work out.  I put my shorts and tank top on when the roommate came home, but ended up working on stuff for the race that I totally forgot!

Plus the roommate was annoying me even more than usual. I told him I couldn't stand how he talks to our son that he should just put duct tape on his mouth from the minute he walks in the door. I wish he would just work more hours and leave us alone. I swear I do better without him. He never listens to me anyway!

Just now after my workout I went in by him and told him to listen for the baby. I know it's late and he's tired, but the baby is on an apnea monitor because he stops breathing.  I jumped in the shower for all of 5 minutes came out to find that he shut the bedroom door and put the AC on. How the hell did he think he would hear the alarm if it went off?? I guess it doesn't matter I hear it when I'm in the shower. There have been just too many times that it's gone off and I've had to jump out of the shower to go rescue my little boy.

I'm so happy I have friends and family and boyfriends who make me smile.  Because if I didn't I would have jumped out a window long ago living with this roommate! He makes everything so stressful, meanwhile I can laugh for months over a silly stupid joke about a 3 lemon limit.

Then today I heard a silly thing about salt on TV told the story to someone else so now I'm laughing over lemons and salt. Next thing I know boyfriend asks "where is the tequila?" and I realized I have never had tequila!

I was telling a girlfriend about the salt story and the lemon joke, so she tells me I need to "suck it, lick it and slam it" I couldn't stop laughing. I was smiling all day over that AND Eddie Murphy's Goognie Goo Goo





So over all I had a good day, laughed a lot, talked to a few friends, got some scrap stuff done and worked out!

Here are my before and after work out photos





I'm going to work on a few more things for the ADSR7 and then take a nap. See you tomorrow.
Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$

Day 38 - getting back into the swing of things

Trying to get back into some kind of normal routine this week. The kids both go up early so I got them fed and dressed, which meant I could get in an early work out!

I took my before picture with Alexander today, because he will be the first person in my life who will not remember me fat!! That is an awesome feeling. Alexander is going to have an AWESOME MOM! One who doesn't dread getting into a bath suit, or shorts. One who will jump on a plane to visit Cousin Chris or Cousin Vinnie and not worry that the seat belt won't fit.



Anthony may or may not remember what I looked like. I hope over time, the memories of fat mommy fade for him. He's a great support. He came into the living room while I was working out and said "You're doing great Mom" That little guy has no idea how those words just melt my heart. I don't know when I'll be fit enough to start jogging but I am really looking forward to it. My little ADHD guy is going to come with me! Maybe running around the track will help him with all his energy and it will pave the way for him to be a fit adult. I know I'm already doing well teaching him healthy eating habits.
Here I am done with my work out. Take notice of Anthony playing with his trains in the hall way. He stayed out of my way and played there so I could do my work out.


I am really pushing to be able to do more. I was able to get into plank position and do 3 push ups like that. The rest I had to do on my knees. I'm going to keep trying to do them every day, until I can handle 5. I'll keep working on them until I can stay in plank position and do them all like that.

I got a bunch of things done this morning including some laundry. On my way upstairs I notice something that the roommate  did! He took a few things out of recycling and hid them in the basement. This is one of the MANY REASONS I hate him! I'm so sick of him taking things out of the garbage or recycling and hiding it. I don't understand his attachment to things and not people. I will NEVER understand it. And if he doesn't stop and get help he is going to lose his kids not just me!

Hoarding is an illness, just like over eating! Nobody can help him unless he wants to help himself. I want to change, I want to live and do things with my kids. He rather have stuff and lose his whole family over it.

Things are at the point with him, that when I'm doing the punches in the Jillian Michael 30 day shred, I am picturing his face or I turn around and face our wedding picture on the wall and do my punches looking at that. He is NOT the man I married. He is NOT the man who made me fall in love with him. He did a great job of hiding the real him until after my last name was changed.

I am changing my life and I'm not taking that hoarding monkey's ass with me! The chapters with him in it every day will soon be over. The me I always wanted to be is coming out and I'm going to be the best me ever, without him!

See you tomorrow when I'm sweating like a pig again. I'm hoping I can do some scrap designing tonight.
Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$