I took my before picture with Alexander today, because he will be the first person in my life who will not remember me fat!! That is an awesome feeling. Alexander is going to have an AWESOME MOM! One who doesn't dread getting into a bath suit, or shorts. One who will jump on a plane to visit Cousin Chris or Cousin Vinnie and not worry that the seat belt won't fit.
Anthony may or may not remember what I looked like. I hope over time, the memories of fat mommy fade for him. He's a great support. He came into the living room while I was working out and said "You're doing great Mom" That little guy has no idea how those words just melt my heart. I don't know when I'll be fit enough to start jogging but I am really looking forward to it. My little ADHD guy is going to come with me! Maybe running around the track will help him with all his energy and it will pave the way for him to be a fit adult. I know I'm already doing well teaching him healthy eating habits.
Here I am done with my work out. Take notice of Anthony playing with his trains in the hall way. He stayed out of my way and played there so I could do my work out.
I am really pushing to be able to do more. I was able to get into plank position and do 3 push ups like that. The rest I had to do on my knees. I'm going to keep trying to do them every day, until I can handle 5. I'll keep working on them until I can stay in plank position and do them all like that.
I got a bunch of things done this morning including some laundry. On my way upstairs I notice something that the roommate did! He took a few things out of recycling and hid them in the basement. This is one of the MANY REASONS I hate him! I'm so sick of him taking things out of the garbage or recycling and hiding it. I don't understand his attachment to things and not people. I will NEVER understand it. And if he doesn't stop and get help he is going to lose his kids not just me!
Hoarding is an illness, just like over eating! Nobody can help him unless he wants to help himself. I want to change, I want to live and do things with my kids. He rather have stuff and lose his whole family over it.
Things are at the point with him, that when I'm doing the punches in the Jillian Michael 30 day shred, I am picturing his face or I turn around and face our wedding picture on the wall and do my punches looking at that. He is NOT the man I married. He is NOT the man who made me fall in love with him. He did a great job of hiding the real him until after my last name was changed.
I am changing my life and I'm not taking that hoarding monkey's ass with me! The chapters with him in it every day will soon be over. The me I always wanted to be is coming out and I'm going to be the best me ever, without him!
See you tomorrow when I'm sweating like a pig again. I'm hoping I can do some scrap designing tonight.
Thanks for reading My Big Fat @$$
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